The Eight Kinds of Friends You Need to Have

第一次在博客里,摘抄一篇文章,叫做:人生不能缺少 8 类朋友。非常喜欢,分享给你。
原文链接:The Eight Kinds of Friends You Need to Have

随着生活节奏的加快,社会的浮躁和功利,人与人之间有着太多分不清的是非真伪,以至于我们对“朋友”的称谓产生了畏惧。那么,真正的朋友究竟是什么样的,人的一生到底需要什么样的朋友呢?美国作家帕尔指出,“不要指望一位密友带给你所需要的一切。”
另一位作家 汤姆·拉思 则认为,以下8种朋友是必不可少的。 Tom Rath’s book Vital Friends: The People You Can’t Afford to Live Without.

成就你的朋友: Builder

“Builders are great motivators, always pushing you toward the finish line. They continually invest in your development and genuinely want you to succeed — even if it means they have to go out on a limb for you”

他们会不断激励你,让你看到自己的优点。这类朋友也可称之为导师型。他们不一定是你的师长,但他们一定会在某些领域具有丰富的经验,能经常在事业、家庭、人际交往等各方面给你提供许多建议。人生中拥有这种朋友会成为你最大的心理支柱,也常常会成为能够“左右”你的“偶像”。

支持你的朋友: Champion

“Champions stand up for you and what you believe in. They are the friends who sing your praises. Every day, this makes a difference in your life. Not only do they praise you in your presence, but a Champion also ‘has your back’ — and will stand up for you when you’re not around”

一直维护你,并在别人面前称赞你。这类朋友可谓是“你帮我,我帮你”,相互打气,使得彼此成为对方成长的垫脚石。在一个人的成长过程中,朋友的支持与鼓励是最珍贵的。当你遇到挫折时,这类朋友往往可以帮你分担一部分的心理压力,他们的信任也恰恰是你的“强心剂”。

志同道合的朋友: Collaborator

“A collaborator is a friend with similar interests — the basis for many great friendships. … When you talk with a collaborator, you’re on familiar ground … you often find that you have similar ambitions in work and life”

和你兴趣相近,也是你最有可能与之相处的人。与他们在一起,会让你有心灵感应,俗称“默契”。你会因为想的事、说的话都与他们相近,经常有被触摸心灵的感觉。和他们交往会帮助你不断地进行自我认同,你的兴趣、人生目标或是喜好,都可以与他们分享。这种稳固的感受“共享”会让你获得心理上的安全感,因为有他们,你更容易实现理想,并可以快乐地成长。

牵线搭桥的朋友: Connector

“A connector is a bridge builder. …. Connectors get to know you — and then introduce you to others”. Connectors are always inviting you to lunch and other gatherings where you can meet new people, and point you in the right direction when you need something.

认识你之后,很快把你介绍给志同道合者认识。 这类朋友是“帮助型”的朋友。在你得意的时候,他们的身影可能并不多见;在你失意的时候,他们却会及时地出现在你面前。他们始终愿意给予你最现实的支持,让你看到希望和机会,帮助你不断地得到积极的心理暗示。

给你打气的朋友: Energizer

“Energizers are your ‘fun friends’ who always give you a boost. You have more positive moments when you are with these friends. Energizers are quick to pick you up when you’re down — and can make a good day great”

好玩、能让你放松的朋友。 有些朋友,当我们有了心事,有了苦恼时,第一个想要倾诉的对象就是他们。这样的朋友会是很好的倾听者,让你放松,在他们面前,你没有任何心理压力,总能让你发泄出自己的“郁闷”,让你重获平衡的心态。

开阔眼界的朋友: Mind Opener

‘Mind Openers are the friends who expand your horizons and encourage you to embrace new ideas, opportunities, cultures, and people. They challenge you to think in innovative ways and help you create positive change. Mind Openers know how to ask good questions, and this makes you more receptive to ideas”

能让你接触新观点、新机会。 这类朋友对于人生也是必不可少。他们可谓是你的“大百科全书”。这类朋友的知识广、视野宽、人际脉络多,会帮助你获得许多不同的心理感受,使你成为站得高、看得远的人。

给你引路的朋友: Navigator

“Navigators are the friends who give you advice and keep you headed in the right direction. You go to them when you need guidance, and they talk through the pros and cons with you until you find an answer. In a difficult situation, you need a Navigator by your side. They help you see a positive future while keeping things grounded in reality”

善于帮你理清思路,需要指导和建议时去找他们。 这类朋友是“指路灯”。每个人都有困难和需要,一旦靠自己力量难以化解时,这类朋友总能最及时、最认真地考虑你的问题,给你最适当的建议。在你面对选择而焦虑、困惑时,不妨找他们聊一聊,或许能帮助你更好的理顺情绪,了解自己,明确方向。

陪伴你的朋友: Companion

“A companion is always there for you, whatever the circumstance. You share a bond that is virtually unbreakable. When something big happens in your life, this is one of the first people you call”

有了消息,不论是好是坏,总是第一个告诉他们。他们一直和你在一起。 这种朋友的心胸像大海、高山一样宽广,不管何时找他们,他们都会热情相待,并且始终如一地支持你。他们是能让你感到满足和平静的朋友,有时并不需要他们太多的语言,只是默默地陪着你,就能抚平你的心情。

2015-06-12

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